Is My Child in an Unhealthy Relationship: 5 Warning Signs

Dr. Elsa Friis

Table of Contents

As a parent, you want your child to experience healthy, supportive relationships. But how can you tell if your child’s relationship has taken an unhealthy turn? Unhealthy relationships can happen at any age, so it's important to watch for these warning signs:

1. Isolating or withdrawing from family and friends

As your child grows up it is healthy for them to want to spend more time with friends or their partner. However, an abusive partner may try to isolate them from friends and family. Check-in and make sure your child is still spending time with friends and other activities they used to enjoy. 

2. Constant communication with their partner

Being in constant communication with a partner may suggest possessive or controlling behavior is going on. Notice if your child feels like they have to check in all the time or if their partner calls/texts them repeatedly. Explain to your child that their partner should never require them to check in or get angry if they don’t respond. 

3. Making Excuses for Partner's Behavior

Victims may defend their abusive partner. Listen non-judgmentally if your teen opens up about relationship problems. Your child may not want to immediately open up so be patient yet persistent if you are concerned. 

4. Hiding Injuries

Notice if your child starts wearing long sleeves or heavy makeup as these may be ways your child hides bruises cuts or other injuries. If your child blames injuries on sports or accidents, follow up with their coach or other sources to ensure this is true. 

5. Losing Interests and Hobbies

If your formerly active, social teen drops activities they used to enjoy, it may be because their partner disapproves. It is normal for your child to start to listen to the same music their partner likes or spend more time doing things their partner likes to do. However, a partner should never dictate what your teen wears and does. 

Trust your instincts if you notice any warning signs or changes in your child’s mood or behaviors. Speak up and offer unconditional non-judgemental support. In abusive situations, the most important thing is your child's safety. Contact a licensed mental health professional or the National Domestic Violence Hotline for additional resources and support. 

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