5 Ways to Support Your Child Who Reported a Physical Health Concern

1. Thank Your Child for Speaking Up

Many children hesitate to tell adults when something is wrong with their body. They may worry about:

• Being seen as "dramatic" or making a big deal out of nothing
• Getting in trouble (especially if an injury happened doing something they shouldn't)
• Missing school, sports, or activities they care about
• Medical appointments, procedures, or shots
• Burdening their parents

What to say:

• "Thank you for telling me something is going on. I'm glad you spoke up."
• "Your health is important to me, and I always want to know when something doesn't feel right."
• "You're not in trouble. I just want to make sure you're okay."
• "It's always better to check on something than to ignore it."
• "You know your body best. If something feels wrong, that matters."

Help them understand: Speaking up about health concerns—even ones that turn out to be minor—is always the right thing to do. Early attention often prevents small problems from becoming bigger ones.

2. Gather Information Calmly

Before deciding on next steps, take a moment to understand what your child is experiencing. Try to stay calm, even if what they share worries you—your child will take cues from your reaction.

Questions to ask:

• "Can you tell me more about what you're feeling?"
• "When did this start? Has it happened before?"
• "Can you show me where it hurts?" (if applicable)
• "On a scale of 1-10, how bad does it feel?"
• "Is there anything that makes it better or worse?"
• "Did anything happen before this started?" (fall, eating something, etc.)

What to watch for:

Signs that may indicate a need for immediate medical attention:

• Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath
• Severe pain that isn't improving
• High fever (over 103°F) or fever with other concerning symptoms
• Signs of allergic reaction (swelling, hives, difficulty swallowing)
• Head injury with confusion, vomiting, or loss of consciousness
• Bleeding that won't stop
• Sudden weakness, numbness, or difficulty speaking

If you observe any of these signs: Seek emergency care immediately by calling 911 or going to the nearest emergency room.

3. Validate Their Experience

Children sometimes downplay symptoms because they don't want to worry their parents, or exaggerate because they're scared. Either way, take their concerns seriously while helping them feel safe.

If they seem scared:

• "I can see this is worrying you. Let's figure it out together."
• "Whatever is going on, we'll handle it. You don't have to deal with this alone."
• "It's okay to be nervous. Bodies can do confusing things sometimes."

If they seem embarrassed:

• "There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Bodies have all kinds of things happen to them."
• "Doctors and nurses see this kind of thing all the time. It's totally normal to ask about it."
• "I'm glad you told me instead of trying to deal with this by yourself."

If the concern seems minor:

• "I'm glad it doesn't seem too serious, but I still want to keep an eye on it."
• "Let's check in again tomorrow and see how you're feeling."
• "Even small things are worth paying attention to."

If you're unsure whether it's serious: When in doubt, call your child's doctor or a nurse advice line. They can help you determine whether your child needs to be seen and how urgently.

4. Create a Plan Together

Involving your child in the plan helps them feel more in control and less anxious about what comes next.

For non-urgent concerns:

• Explain what you're going to do: "Let's schedule an appointment with Dr. [Name] to get this checked out."
• Give them a timeline: "I'll call tomorrow morning, and we'll probably go in this week."
• Ask what would help them feel better in the meantime: rest, ice, a heating pad, etc.

For urgent concerns:

• Stay calm and explain clearly: "I think we should have a doctor look at this today to make sure everything is okay."
• Reassure them: "This is just to be safe. The doctor will help us figure out what's going on."

If your child is resistant to medical care:

• Acknowledge their feelings: "I know you don't want to go to the doctor. Can you tell me what you're worried about?"
• Be honest but reassuring: "I understand it's not fun, but your health comes first. I'll be with you the whole time."
• Offer appropriate choices: "Would you rather go to the doctor's office or the urgent care clinic?"

5. Follow Up and Monitor

After addressing the immediate concern, continue to check in with your child about how they're feeling.

Check in regularly:

• "How are you feeling today compared to yesterday?"
• "Is the [symptom] getting better, staying the same, or getting worse?"
• "Is there anything else bothering you that you haven't mentioned?"

Watch for patterns:

Sometimes physical symptoms can be connected to stress, anxiety, or other emotional factors. This doesn't mean the symptoms aren't real—stress can cause very real physical experiences. Consider whether:

• Symptoms tend to appear at certain times (before school, before tests, etc.)
• Your child has been under unusual stress lately
• There have been changes at school, with friends, or at home

If you notice a pattern: This doesn't mean your child is "faking it." Talk with their doctor about the connection between stress and physical symptoms. Your child may benefit from support for both their physical and emotional wellbeing.

Keep communication open:

• "I want you to always feel like you can tell me when something's wrong."
• "Even if it turns out to be nothing, I'd rather know than have you worry alone."
• "Your body is pretty good at telling you when something's off. Keep listening to it."

When to Seek Care: A Quick Reference

Situation	Recommended Action
Life-threatening emergency (difficulty breathing, severe bleeding, loss of consciousness, chest pain)	Call 911 immediately
Urgent but not life-threatening (high fever, possible broken bone, severe pain, signs of infection)	Go to urgent care or ER, or call your doctor for same-day guidance
Concerning but not urgent (persistent symptoms, moderate pain, something that's been going on for a few days)	Schedule an appointment with your child's doctor within 1-2 days
Minor concern (mild symptoms, no fever, child is functioning normally)	Monitor at home, schedule routine appointment if symptoms persist beyond a few days
Unsure	Call your doctor's nurse advice line or your insurance's 24/7 nurse hotline for guidance

Additional Resources

Medical Resources:

• Emergency: Call 911
• Poison Control: 1-800-222-1222 (24/7)
• Nurse Advice Line: Check with your insurance provider or pediatrician's office for after-hours guidance

If physical symptoms may be connected to emotional wellbeing:

• Talk with your child's doctor about the mind-body connection
• Consider whether counseling might help your child manage stress
• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 (24/7) if your child expresses thoughts of self-harm